Adam Joel Rickard

If I had known

“If I had known you were
going to die, I would
have given you more
time. I would have
listened more, been
there for you. Made sure
you knew how loved you

If I had known you were
going to take your life, I
would have gone with
you to find help. I would
have taken your weight
loss seriously and tried
to confront the sadness
in your eyes.

If I had known that time
in the park was our last
time together, I would
have held you in my
arms and never let you

I would have checked
you out of hospital and
found some sunshine for
you, somewhere.

If I had known.”

Jo Vujevic


When I’ll think of you…
…When I’ll remember you.
I’ll think of a fragile heart.

Though I didn’t know you well,
Your fragile heart beat through
Your love shone through
Your fragile heart, your fragile heart
It couldn’t accept all the love surrounding it
Sickness shrouded the love that could have saved you
– This I understood –
You loved others by your actions, by your words
When I’ll think of you…
This is what I’ll remember of you.

But I’ll always wish that you could
have found a safe haven
As I did, when I too was fragile
But we still remember the love
that shone through you – the memories.

When I’ll think of you…
…When I remember you.
I know God has you in his keeping
He always was in your fragile heart.

– One day we’ll find out why it broke –

Jennie Peschke


The Wall of Understanding

The need to write
To connect, to feel
To unravel the past
To reveal
To heal

I stand alone
With eternity near
I form the word
So dear
So clear

My thoughts are of Adam
His struggle, his fall
The tears unending
A wall
Too tall

Bruce Rickard (October 2011)


One wants to forget
One works to revive
One strives to forgive
One struggles to survive

One longs for silence
One listens for a word
One call for tomorrow
One confession to be heard

Bruce Rickard (November 2011)

Adam’s Ashes

There is no coffin buried in the ground
There is no sacristy where peace can be found
There is no epitaph, no thanksgiving, no rite
There are Adam’s ashes, forgotten, not quite.

There is no celebration of a life no more
There is no comfort for hearts at war
There is no joy when the future is mired
By Adam’s ashes, resting at my side.

There will come a time when the way will be made clear
When spirits are whole and memories hold dear
It will be a time of release, a time of letting go
And Adam’s ashes will return to a place we know.

Bruce Rickard